Comedians Mourn Weiner Announcement

LONDON - Comedians worldwide reacted with shock and horror to the news that Rep. Anthony Weiner had resigned. "It's as though millions of jokes were snuffed out before they even had a chance," noted a shaken Arlene Frisbane, moments before taking the stage at the Funny Bone in Pittsburgh. "Thank God we still have Joe Biden and Newt Gingrich." The comedy world will have to adjust to the loss of a punchline-rich motherlode, the likes of which hadn't been seen since Dick Cheney shot his friend in the face over 4 years ago. "Can we go on without Weiner jokes?" asked one comedian, "Absolutely. But you'll hear the sadness in our voices each time we pass one up."