SOCHI Pandemonium reined today at the Curling competition in Sochi when the Russians ran out of beer mid-competition. "This is curling isn't it?" fumed Irish curler Brian O'Floozin, "why don't we try it without ice too." Canadian seeker Gordon Stoner echoed the sentiment, "Who understands the importance of drinking to curling - hell, to life - better than Russians." Security personnel at the venue promised to make sure coolers were stocked for the finals and vowed to find the culprits in the beer heist, "after we have a little nap."
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